MadameA 

 "Are you here for the demonstration?" asked Steven Otero, programmer for Sexy Spirits, a sex-positive education center specializing in Tantric and Taoist practices. I'd arrived at the apartment of Sexy Spirits' founder Anton Diaz for a lecture on Taontric massage and expanded orgasm ("Taontric" is actually the correct spelling of the word, despite the popular use of "Tantric").

"Will someone be having an orgasm?" I asked Steven.

"Well, our model is menstruating, so probably not, but we'll get her close," said the tan, exotic, muscled Anton. While women can certainly orgasm during that time of the month, getting off mid-period in front of an audience might have been messy.

I took a seat among the other attendees - mostly middle-aged, slightly crunchy men. One wore Birkenstocks and appeared to be meditating.

I'm not an overly spiritual person. I go to temple on Yom Kippur so I can break the fast with my gossipy, Jewish family. I do yoga for the exercise; I don't give a shit about my chakras being balanced. But I'm into girl power, so when Anton said, "Unless the woman is happy, nobody's gonna be happy," he had my attention. In Taontric massage the man is the giver and the woman is the receiver. The massage is pleasurable for the giver because he enjoys touching someone else without reciprocation.

I thought about all the guys I knew. Yeah fucking right.

Suddenly, Michaela - Anton's hot, black model - was face down on the table wearing only a leopard-print thong. Anton explained that he'd met her once before this evening and that he'd never massaged her before. He ran his hands up and down her sinewy back, connecting the cranial dent to the tailbone in order to connect the mind to the genitals. His touch was lighter than what's used in Swedish massage because he wasn't easing muscular tension; he was creating sexual energy.

To the beat of new age music, Anton rhythmically rubbed Michaela's butt cheeks and thighs, discussing the importance of touching every part of the body and leaving one part starving for attention. I don't know if it was the convincing dialogue or the fact that I'm a sucker for Enya, but watching a man lovingly and unselfishly touch a woman he hardly knew was really beautiful to see.

Taontric massage can stretch for four or five hours; this, of course, was an abbreviated version. After Anton finished touching Michaela's entire body, she looked as though she'd had a relaxing day at a spa. Anton concluded the demonstration with a graphic video of a man's fingers slowly touching a woman's outer and inner labia. Once the energy was right, he merely ran his fingers from the base to the tip of her engorged clitoris and her entire body shuddered. Apparently, when Taontric massage is done right, a woman can orgasm for up to an hour.

Most guys won't even take the time to learn how to give good head to their girlfriends, so the concept of them devoting hours to female pleasure is tough to swallow. Still, the fact that Anton's audience was made up of mostly men - who were engaged to the point of note-taking! - was nice to see. I guess some guys realize that the more you give, the more you get.